The callousness of death

I’m 21 years old and have never lost anyone close to me. I guess you could say I’ve been lucky. Not anymore.

I just lost my uncle in an accident, he was 41 years old and in perfect health. Until he just wasn’t there anyone. You always hear about freak accidents but you never think it’ll happen to you.
Until it does. And I’m lost. When I heard what had happened I thought it was a joke. A cruel joke.

Movies paint loss as a long process that heals eventually but real life is not about inspirational montages and arguments in front of a house of worship.

Death means finality. It means you don’t get a second chance.

The worst is when it’s unexpected and I say so only because we think that we have forever with the people we love. That we will get a chance to see them, laugh with them and love them.
When it comes out of the blue the biggest regret we all have is the fact that we didn’t get the chance I say goodbye.

When I think about him, I feel anger and I feel sick. He was too young to pass away. Why would God or whoever it is that is responsible for these things choose to do this to someone who deserved a long, full life?

The only consolation I naively seek is maybe he was just too good for this world; he deserved to be in a better place. At times I can smile, when I’m distracted by life.

It hasn’t sunk it that he’s gone. That when I visit his house he just won’t be there .The pain lessens because life goes on and we have to move on with it

The pain that you feel does not go away.. and there won’t be a day I won’t regret not having a chance to say goodbye to my uncle. He was supposed to give me away at my wedding, according to Indian tradition.

I will feel his loss then and everyday of my life there will be a place in my heart that will remember him. He has left a hole in our family that can never be replaced. To a life that was well lived but cut short too soon and too unfairly. We love you and we miss you.

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Published in: on November 11, 2010 at 12:26 am  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. Prayer is the answer….Chandni, that is all we can do. Lotsa love – Kamal


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